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What is the friend zone? Is the friend zone real? How can i escape the friend zone? Am i in the friend zone? How do i know if i am in the friend zone? Dating for dummies. The bermuda triangle. what is the bermuda triangle? Dating advice. “Let’s just be friends,” “I don’t want to ruin the friendship” or “you are like a brother/sister to me.” If you ever hear any of these words, ‘do not pass go,’ ‘do not collect $200.’ Head straight to the ‘friend zone’, where you shall remain forever & ever. You have seen it in movies, you have seen the memes, and it’s often a topic on social media sites. What is the friend zone? Based on what I have seen online, I can safely say that there is not a clear and accepted definition of the friend zone. Wikipedia defines it here & the Urban Dictionary offers multiple definitions here. However it is defined, there are certain elements that need to be present for somebody to enter the friend zone.

First, person X must be interested in person Y. It’s after person X shows interest in person Y & is rebuffed (often with one of the lines I mentioned at the beginning of this post) that person X is on their way to the friend zone. If person X, in hopes of winning over person Y, continues the pursuit, while doing favors, etc. for person Y and is still rejected. Then that person is officially in the friend zone. However, if person X accepts that their pursuit of person Y was a failure and moves on, then it is not considered being ‘friend zoned’. Person X was merely ‘curved’. For person X to be in the friend zone, they must be actively pursuing person Y even after they were rejected. It is this active pursuit and continued rejection that is key to being in the friend zone. There is a common misconception that only men can be friend zoned. This is not the case. Men are usually the suitors, so it’s natural that they will be friend zoned more often. Women are also friend zoned, this happens less often for obvious reasons. It is my experience that women don’t handle being friend zoned well, so men should be careful.

The friend zone is the Bermuda Triangle of dating. There is no escaping the friend zone as far as I am concerned. A lot of good people have fallen victim to the friend zone, never to be seen or heard from again. Seriously, if you know somebody that escaped the friend zone, please let me know in the comments section. People often mistake two friends becoming involved as proof of someone escaping the friend zone. This could not be further from the truth. Friends becoming involved is a pretty regular occurrence & has nothing to do with the friend zone. Two friends deciding to start a relationship is commendable, but it doesn’t mean that one of them was in the friend zone.

I came across these two articles that I thought could help some lovelorn soul: ‘How to Escape the Friend Zone’ and ‘Avoiding the Friend Zone: Becoming a Girlfriend or Boyfriend.’ To add to that, I think the most important way to prevent the friend zone is not to be desperate. Desperation is like an express elevator straight to the friend zone. Another way to avoid the friend zone is by just observing the signs and signals. If somebody is interested in your advances, often you will be able to tell. They say love is blind, but that might also be true for those languishing in the friend zone.

Honestly, I have been friend zoned. (In my teenage years) If you live long enough & have an active social life, eventually you will be friend zoned too. I also have friend zoned women. (I am not proud of this)There is no shame in being friend zoned, IF you recognize it, accept it and move on as quickly as possible. Trying to escape the friend zone (winning over the person) is equal to and as difficult as trying to get somebody to ‘switch teams’. It won’t happen!

 I know I said the friend zone is inescapable, for the most part, it is. However, there is a way that someone can escape the friend zone. Here is the secret: end the ‘friendship’! Barring that, you will be in the friend zone for eternity. In the end, the only way to escape the friend zone is to avoid it all together.

14 comments on “The Friend Zone: The Bermuda Triangle of Dating

  1. stannyha says:

    Nice article Ren. You touched on some good points. Over the years, I have observed (and experienced for myself) that moving right along after a rejection yields results in the future. More than once I have heard my bredrens say “…she never want me when mi a look her. Now me & deh and all of a sudden she a give me ‘the eye’ …”.

    To the matter of women not handling being friend zoned well. Bingo! And we thought men were egotistical? Ha!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Ren_egade says:

      Thanks Stanny. Languishing in the friend zone is not a good look,especially for men.

      Like

  2. misslibraja says:

    Great article. I finally understand this whole “friend zone” issue. Been seeing discussions recently. I can’t remembet if I’ve ever been “friend zone (d)” if I have, I certainly have forgotten over it lol…. I’m good at hiding my feelings so I can tell most of the times if I like a guy and that he feels the same. I wont put myself out there if I’m certain we are not on the same page.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ren_egade says:

      Glad you now understand. The friend zone is not for the faint of heart

      Like

  3. Natalia Oh says:

    Haha, okay I’m gonna read all your posts tonight! Why yuh never tag me long time! You’re a great writer!
    Okay, uhmm I have ‘Friend Zoned’ a few guys, and I wouldn’t have it any other way, most of my longest friendships are with guys who got zoned. I don’t remember being ‘Friend Zoned’ myself, I can’t just be friends with a guy I was once interested in. Nope. Team #SeverAllTies

    Great post Ren! Please don’t tell me u have a math captcha I’m no good at those :p
    Natalia Oh

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ren_egade says:

      Thank you. Better late than never. Haha….so you are a serial friend zoner. That’s not cool. I am Team #SeverAllTies too!

      Like

  4. owen says:

    All these friendzone articles popping up lately. All I can say is that it is impossible to sex all the women in the world so its a absolute certainty that you will be friend-zoned at some point. The trick is to not be fz-ed by the one you are attracted to. Attack suddenly like a shark (if you are a guy) before she starts asking you to help her with furniture or you will be a slave to love for the rest of your life until she finds a bf and leaves you out in the cold masterbating.

    If you are a girl ask him to move furniture as quickly as possible before some other girl makes him her moving man.

    Of course this will only work if they aren’t already involved but who knows u might get lucky!

    DO NOT DELAY! If you are already fz-ed I am sorry to say you are doomed – find a hobby and tell them you have a back injury that will prevent you from doing manual labour.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Ren_egade says:

      Haha I couldn’t agree with you more!

      Like

      1. owen says:

        I don’t really think its intentional to be friendzoned. I think some people just park their car in the middle of the road and are surprised when it gets hit by a truck. This onion news article sums it up pretty well. http://www.theonion.com/articles/but-if-we-started-dating-it-would-ruin-our-friends,11473/?ref=auto

        Liked by 1 person

  5. cyah1983 says:

    Which zone are you comfortable with?
    Friend zone?
    Friend with benefits?
    Or are you the type that will mix business with pleasure?
    Uhm! Loll🌍😉

    Like

    1. The Erogenous Zones ☺

      Like

      1. cyah1983 says:

        Well do you have specific erogenous pleasure points???

        Like

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